heart&spinner

And tonight will go on forever while we
walk around this town like we own the streets
and stay awake through summer like we own the heat (bn)

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I’ve been neglecting wordpress lately, mostly because I’ve been at a loss of words.
I’ve been posting photos, music, random thoughts over here now but that tumblr will never be nearly as personal as this blog is.
I’m really upset that I can’t graduate with my own class or walk with Patrick. I feel terrible that I did this but after I found out about that, I purposely failed my freshmen sem class again because I want the reason why I can’t graduate here to be my fault instead of the school administration’s.
I don’t want to accept that I got fucked over by them again so I fucked myself over instead!?! This is my excuse. And because of it, I won’t get any english credits towards SVA either… I’ve concluded that my mind works in terrible ways and really hates me sometimes.
I got into all 4 schools that I applied to this semester, even the more selective one but I chose one of the least selective and am still really conflicted about it. It’s not well known and people confuse the name with SVU but the photo program seems good. I’d still rather be attending another 3 letter acronym though. Hopefully, my forced choice will be validated after my first semester.
blahblahblah. i’ve said too much.
goodnight.

You peel away at them
To be the perfect gentleman of the year

I don’t want you to go to bed
I don’t want you to try to sleep
But Edison
You’re constantly on fire Edison (BB)

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I don’t usually do this but everyone should have this song
In other news, I’m going to SVA
2/4 is not bad and I don’t really care what the other 2 schools have to say anyways
I am feeling quite sick this week but hurray for decisions (!)
Listen to the song, it’ll be worth it, I promise
Goodnight.

key to previous post…
because i’m too fearful to let everyone read that:
mom’s last name

Trace the feel of everything you steal
tell me which is paper and which is real
we won’t answer even when they call
when we’re hiding from shadows that are dancing on the walls (AS)

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This post is very unlike me but here goes…
Catchy and pretty:


50 People, One Question: Brooklyn, London
1 Me, One Question: home, whenever I figure out where/what that is.

That is all? Yes. : )
Good night.

PS: Catchy and annoying: Flo Rida – Right Round
(sorry for the ph link but I don’t like the quality of any of the youtube ones)

And there’s a clamp around my chest
It tightens every time I lapse into
Another sorry story
…
Yeah when you realize it’s a pattern
And not a phase
It’s what you’ve become
And it’s what you will stay
That’s ballgame
(KD)
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Blah. Blah. Blah.
I hate December.
I feel sick.
I want this year to end.
GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Control yourself
take only what you need from them
a family of trees wanting
to be haunted (MGMT)

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remember me in hs? not going to class and missing assignments?
i’ve fallen into that slump again.
it sucks.
i can’t be doing this.
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.
also, november 1st will be the death of me : S

We’re all right where we’re supposed to be
Time means nothing (WAS)

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stressing out about portfolio and application is basically where my mind is right now.
wish me luck because i can’t really see myself anywhere else studying photography.
the curse of spending a month there i guess.
: S

When you finally fade from those nights you spend
Doing god only knows with your new friends. 
When you decide to come back you always can. (TML)

I’m a mess and you’re worse
Just give me time to give you a waste of time
One of those nights
When you leave me for no reason
I’ll give you a reason (TC)

These rules are made to break and these walls are built to fall
These rules are made to break us all (THS)

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i wish i could dance across the country : (
going to a concert is so happy/depressing all at once.
i’ll be childish and just say: i wish i was in a band SO bad.
the above are snippets from songs the bands played that i was not expecting but was more than happy to hear.
that is all. my parents snore horribly. i can’t sleep.
good night?
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Gloria,
We lied, we can’t go on
This is the time and this is the place to be alive (THS)

So I’m moving to New York cos I’ve got problems with my sleep,
And we’re not the same and I will wear that on my sleeve.
So I’m moving to New York cos I’ve got issues with my sleep,
Looks like Christmas came early, Christmas came early for me. (TW)

Let’s dance to Joy Division
And celebrate the irony
Everything is going wrong
But we’re so happy (TW)
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I had an explanation for the above lyrics.
But I decided to omit it.
All I will say is…
1. I can’t wait for July 13
2. I love my true friends